You know what?

Greetings.....
I was reading a blog today and I realized that while there are many blogs out there that are for the women that have been cheated on, there aren't very many (if any) for those of us who cheated WITH the man. I know why. It's because there's a stigma of "the other woman". Well, I'd like to break that stigma. All "other women" are not whores, sluts or tramps. Some are simply women, like myself, who were lied to and made to believe that one thing was true when it wasn't. Those of us whose feelings were taken advantage of and then trampled. All of us are not waiting at home in skimpy lingerie, in full make-up, with sweetly frangranced skin, lying in wait for YOUR husband. We are not all out stalking him, and constantly calling him to come over to make love to us. Sure, there are some women who fall into that category, BUT all of us don't. There are some, like me, who are pursued by YOUR man with an intensity that would frighten you if you knew about it. Some of us, like me, are living our own lives when YOUR man stops by and under the guise of friendship comes to MY house, pins me against the refrigerator and kisses ME. I was sleeping on several different occassions when YOUR "husband" snuck into MY house with the key that was supposed to be safely on YOUR key chain, climbed into my bed and was inside of me before I knew it, smiling like he was supposed to be there. With NO CONDOM on, telling me how much better I felt than YOU do.

These are the women that need to be represented. There are women who seek out married men, I am not talking about those women. I am talking about the women that would have NO access to YOUR man if he didn't make himself accessible. I lived in Ohio for a YEAR. I didn't know the area, didn't have a car. AND I can't think of ONE time when I asked him to come to me, and yet he always did. Yet, you blame me. You call me the whore. There is a whore involved, but sweetheart, you're married to him. You choose to be. He came to me after making up lies for you. He told you he was going to get a haircut at 6 in the morning. YOU believed him. Yet, by 6am, he was in my bed, scaring me because I didn't expect him to be there. I can be blamed for not saying no, but who wants to say no to the man they love? Yes I did love him. I actually loved him before YOU did, loved him longer and harder that you can ever imagine. Yet, even as he ran to my bed, he runs away from the responsibility of the daughter that we made together. Even as now his "focus" is you, he used to focus on me in the same way, when he was begging me to let him come inside me. Inside ME, where he KNEW he wasn't supposed to be. I am embarassed that I ever let me touch me in such an intimate way. Ashamed that he's SO embarassed of acts that he was SO proud of that he blames ME for "drugging" him. Finally, I am sad that he's denying the daughter that you couldn't give him, the daughter that he said he wanted more than anything. The one I gave him.

That hurts more than anything......